Pet taxi 7 Homeward bound!!!

Areet lads,

A quick one but puzzling all the same.

I really have come to the conclusion that some people just have "TOO" much money.

The Job:

Pick up a lady from Houghton Le Spring and run her up to a charity run animal sanctuary in Westgate. (just past Stanhope about 30 miles)

The story goes like this:

This lady and her sister share a big cottage in Houghton with their elderly mother.
They have an outhouse and barn and there's a flock of Pigeons that decide to congregate in the barn daily.

Being animal lovers they decided to feed the birds and now they won't go away.

The next door neighbour doesn't seem to be happy as she told me "he's been shooting them from his top window with an air rifle,lol.

She phoned the bizzies but they said as they are VERMIN and he's shooting them from his own land they can't do anything about it.

My job is to run her up there and drop the birds off so they can live safe and sound forever in this wonderful place forever.

9am: I pick her up,load about 30 Pigeons into the back of the van in 2 rather large baskets. She seems nice while chatting on the way there, although slightly weird and fucking thick as fuck, but hey! in this job she's about as normal as I can expect.

Something's telling me that there's something amiss here but I don't know what.

10.15amish: We arrive at this so called santuary. It's basically a farm and it's a right shit hole to be honest, it's her decision and she has the birds safety at heart.

We are greeted by some bloke that's the spit of Alan Robson

and he unloads the baskets of birds into a shitty little shed with a makeshift cree built up on the side.

The lady is chatting to Alan while I have a wander around and see a scruffy looking bloke called Pete.

We're chatting and Pete asks "Are you a relative of numb nuts?"

"No I just run her up here, I'm the Pet Taxi" I reply.

He starts to chuckle and then says "She's a nice lady and all but she's fucking dense"

"She brought about 30 up last week and we took them in. We let them settle for a few days to get used to their new home and once we let them out half of the fuckers didn't come back" LMFAO.

That's what was fucking with me on the way there.

Obviously the half that were missing had fucking flew home hadn't they.

So we've got this lady (very caring woman at heart but thick as two short planks to boot.)

I got her home and she pays me £70. Then I get a phone call an hour later.

Sis: Can you run her back up there tomorrow afternoon with some more?" LMAO.

It may not be morally right to carry on taking her up there on a regular basis when the fucking birds are probably gettin home before us.

But,, as the good ole poker saying goes "why tap the glass"

I can't believe I'm about to say this but,, I'm definately NOT going to say never again. (FOR NOW ANYWAY)


TEAMDOBB said...

absolutely wetting me self

roscopiko said...

nice to see some decent content on this blog for a change.

Pet Taxi blog ftw

Ukgatsby said...


3 words... Junes Gatsby Award

TEAMDOBB said...

spotting talent is a skill Rosco

knew it 1st day we met):)

Ukgatsby said...

Surely need to create.. ??

TEAMDOBB said...

weve invited him to join the team by special invitation

watch this space