TAKE A SEAT KIND SIR!

TAKE A SEAT KIND SIR!

The way of life here is of one pace - SLOW so its no good getting all worked up over daft things. All week Sandras Martini and lemonade ( sprite ) has came and gone as VODKA OR GIN mix which has been returned to the bemused bar tenders.So when Oranges arrives he finds good old Tom the super efficient agent organisor has cocked up his hotel booking. Eventually this is sorted and Oranges is seen hobbling about the resort in total agony with a slipped disc in his back. Marriot being ever so helpfull recommends he visits the local witch doctor in town. On returning Oranges is absolutely amazed at this guy and what he has done and found and with only one session the pain has already eased.His next appointment is booked a couple of days later and off he goes in a taxi unable to get there quick enuff to ease the pain hes in. On the journey into town a car pulls out suddenly at a junction forcing the taxi driver the throw the anchors on putting Oranges off his seat but worse for him jolting his back with severe pain hitting all through his body. OMG get me to that docs quick please but on arrival he is greeted at reception by the news that the doctor has been forced to go on an unexpected emergency and is going to be a little bit late for Oranges appointment. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO he thinks and asks the question " pleae how long do you think he will be because im in agony here " The reply is bad being told " It will be at least 4 hours ". OH no what can i do then he asks her which brings back the quote of the week by far in typical caribbean fashion " TAKE A SEAT PLEASE IN THE WAITING ROOM "
Poor Oranges it just aint been his week. Room cock up, in total agony with back, suck out after suck out against him, cant get money out of broken down cash machine so is told he can get cash out his poker account at desk. What is charge for doing this- 8% yes 8% of amount withdrawn. Wow he betta improve his ROI and quick at those rates.
Get well soon m8y.

ITS TOONTOON AGAIN

ITS TOONTOON AGAIN

Y aye man ccanny lads. Its congrats to another Grosvenor regular opponent from final table Ben Holmes ( you do know him rest of teamdobbs ) Slogging it out till the early hours he gained a seat in the main event from the last super satellite of the week. 8 seats were up for grabs and the critical hand came on final table when Danish guy in mid position with reasonable stack pushed all in with AK. Im standing behind Ben at the time and its bingo time for him when he looks down at AA. Showdown for Denmark and his AK lose puts him in desoerate situation devastating his stack. Few hands later and its BB putting him all in. 3 callers check it down and showdown gives 3 full houses with Danish guy at wrong end of it.
Megga well done Ben and another Geordie through to the biggie.
The afternoon 400 freeze out saw Luke ( Meg80) make final table although he relatively low stacked. Congrats on 7th place for about 1700. Brill bud and he was deffo best supported player at final table all week. Crucial hand of final was when 9 handed a push all in by Noseyboy guy from DAAAARNNN SARTH was re raised all in by ClintonO and then anutha all in followed by an aggresive skandie. MONSTA POT. Showdown gives Nosey 88 Clinton AQ and Skandie KK. Flop of 245 brings turn of 8 and woops from Nosey . Rivvvveerrrrrr miracle 3 and Clinton straight takes him big chip leader. Classic crypto stuff.
Few hands later last 6 chop it up with Clinton taking down 1st popsition and a nice little 10k.
Decent nite for me clearing over 1000 in stts and me n Animal troop down for burgers and off to bed. Nite nite and no eartquakes please!

PLEASURE TO PLAY WITH SIR

PLEASURE TO PLAY WITH SIR

I had the pleasure the other nite to play with a skandie guy who is well known in poker circles named Rolf Slotboom. Deffo the best enjoyment outside of winning of this trip. His table manner and humour,his play and constant varied banter mostly was a joy to listen to. I look forward to his company again and mite evn buy his book !

WOWWWWWWWW SHAKEY STUFF

WOWWWWWWWW SHAKEY STUFF

wow decided to give 400 freezeout a miss to get some sleep and play the last chance satellite tonite for main event. Woke up to find out an earthquake shook the place with people running out the card room ffks. me n sandy fast asleep in bed.hope i wasnt snoring too loud.

DONT WORRY BE HAPPY

SHIRLEY BASSEYS NITEMARE THEN TOON TOON SUCESS

SHIRLEY BASSEYS NITEMARE THEN TOON TOON SUCESS

Dont get too excited the toon sucess aint mine ! 2nd event and 2 geordies make final table. Mark Soapy Suddes takes 7th place and Stanley regular John JnrD Devlin chops 1st place for $9000.Megga well done you 2. Final table was all action affair with Mad Irish Man Peter Drummie Burgon up to all sorts of antics. Last 4 was crazy with John Devlin, Mad Irish Man, Romanian guy ( Thienry friend ) and Asian guy with Liverpool top on. Mad irish man single raises Devlins BB and call. Flop comes 58A to check from John and Irish man pushes all in to instant call from John holding 85. Bingo and Paddy is down top 4500 on blinds of 8000. Suck out after suck sees him get back to level incredibly and he trys to steal Liverpool top guy with q6 for call with AK hts. Flops is k610 turn 7 river QQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQueeeeeeeen. Unreal.
Last 3 chop it for gr8 final table. Pi8cs to follow soon.

Shirley Bassy and diamonds aint for ever Im afraid. Im in good postion 22 left for 6 seats my BB on last hand of session all fold sb who limps in for 200. Im AQ hts and bet 1000. He calls and flop is 10d 7d 3 s He checks so I bet out 1400 and after long thought he calls. Fk cant back out now and before turn is dealt Ive decided Im all in. Turn brings 5 d he checks and I push but no instant call so Im sure Im still ahead. Oh dear hee it comes ( cant fold even though Im behind and you got me ) He shows Kc Jd and yip in comes the 5d for runner runner flush but wtf he was calling my continuation bet for confuses me?

Last chance today to sat into main event. Not gonna play this afternoon so hope Im better focused.

Interesting hand during sat was with big name skandie pro to my left. My BB he raises UTG to 600 on 200 blinds. Frenchie to his left calls all fold to me looking down at AA. Do I push or flat call ck the flop then bet out? I decide fk it no messing about cos Im sure skandie got top premium hand the way hed been playing. Push all in and then omg all the outcrys and dramatics start. He openly discussing and announcing I got AA. Didnt think at time but should of beasted him about this cos Frechie to his left still to act. He folds QQ and Frenchie also folds.
Have my time again I totally give him verbals.
Anyway time running out so betta post.
Thanks to cockney guy for offer of 10% buy in for me into main event. Much appreciated but Ill get through tonite man !

DONT DRINK N RAISE !

DONT DRINK N RAISE !

Its off and running after opening freebies of 2 hour bar and horses doofer things.
1st tournie saw satellite into main event with good field although tuff with only 1000 starter chips. Did ok till table move saw me exit after only 2 hands there. Guy utg itched to raise but flat calls and guy in 4th position moves all in for 1800. I call with my 99 for utg limper to re raise all in and commited me sees 88 at top of table but jj to re raiser.
Onto cash table 1/2 which was gr8 laff and then the mad norwegian sits down making it virtually $15 dollars min bet when hes in hand. Where are the poker gods when u need them and was totally card dead but got steadily more drunk. Busted out at 4.30 in morn with the dreaded 99 again. Wake up next morn with stonkin headache and paracetamol desperately needed.
Day 2 sees the 200 freeze out which although slow start steadily speeded up. Decent field with top 18 cashing. Raise to my bb by button got me to push all in with qq and he shows kk ouch. Queen flop gets me home.
THienry to my right and Azimut 3 to my left. Push with 66 on my bb after TH raised and called with A9. Turn brings my set cos TH hits river A and Im decent stacked now.
The dreaded table move and antes kick in. Card dead for an hour then AK clubs BB. Guy on SB limps 2 way pot. I raise to 1200 to which he immediately pushes all in. My call is greeted by OH FUCK LOOKS LIKE I BEEN CAUGHT. He shows K 10 off.
FLOP COMES K 10 3 AND DOESNT IMPROVE bye bye. Another fkn suck out and not far off the cash.

HERE THEY COME!

HERE THEY COME!

Its the 26th and last night saw the start of the influx for the tournament week. Glad I came out week early cos weve had great relaxing week in prep for the hectic week ahead. Cash tables now in operation and last nite saw the 1st 2/5 open up. Not for me just stuck to 1/2 and after being totally card dead for hours eventually hit a few hands to come out 270 up- do me.
Introduced to lovely guy named Mad Turk on way out and he certainly likes to gamble.
He was like a bricklayer building a wall on the 2/5 then even jumped over to craps while still on poker and played like a demolition expert.
Moved room this morning so Sandy can be in main part of hotel. Gr8 decision as we now have excellent ocean view room with balcony. Best thing though is room is very close to Casino and its an easy walk back for her - makes me more relaxed now.
Rite its pool time - tuff life sometimes!

ST KITTS UPDATE

ST KITTS UPDATE

Arrived safe and sound in St Kitts and the resort is just as good if not better than I had been told it was.1st 2 days was pretty quiet and we got a game of 1/2 cash in the casino. Down 100 1st nite up 450 2nd so happy wit that. Funny the characters you get sitting at these games. We called one guy string bet ernie for his efforts and spent 10 minutes explaing his flush of hearts to a 6 was no good as Rob Price held the nuts with the Q to a 4 heart flush.
Played golf and the course was megga with a back 9 to die for along the ocean. Off the wall and richochet palm tree Luke collected along with Animal. Shared back 9 and Azi lost all. He soon pull it back in poker no doubt.
Reet gotta go l8 ers all

Hit the bar

Hit the bar

Close but no cigar, just moved to full tilt after doing in what was left in my pokerstars account. Deposited 600dollars so I'm going to work on getting the 100% bonus, realising its going to take some getting considering i mainly play mtts at low stakes i decided to try my hand at cash, 300 down and haven't even cleared my first 20dollar bonus lol. So fuck chasing bonuses for me and stick to what I'm best at which is mtts. Managed a final table in the 3.5k played really well the blind system goes up slower on here which also works for me. Went out in 6th place which was disappointing, me qq in bb position all fold to button he single raise, i all in he sits for ages calls 2 thirds off his stack and shows kjc hit my set on flop he hits flush draw, turn flush, river no help I'm gone. He then types in a load of slaver of how sorry he is which didn't take the bitter tastes out off my mouth as the money was just starting to get nice, oh i also bubbled in a freeroll for some aussie millions thing which I'm still wounded over the guy who i was heads up against from 315 runners was 1wisdomking a real gent and a real solid player, i wish him all the best in the qualifier and before i forget MEGA garden party at whickham tonight meet at bridlepath @ 7:30pm wait till u see my new waterfall with lights ha ha

Die slowly steve maclaren

Die slowly steve maclaren

Well its a very bemused gyposdog here, im fucking distraught at englands pityfull efforts last night. What that stupid ginger cunt maclaren was thinking of i dont know but its fair to say he didnt do what he was meant to do and therefore has been sacked and rightly so. The thing that nearly pisses me off as much as us not being there, is the fact that useless horsemouthed cunt is getting a WHOPPING pay off for being shite at his job WTF? Personally id of loved to dig out the old footy boots and stamped his p45 down his throat but thats just wishful thinking. On a much lighter note id like to say a BIG BE LUCKY LADS to all the gang out in st kitts and a special be lucky to teamdobb and azimut, i think this could be the one, we still 10%dc?

THATS IT ON MY WAY

THATS IT ON MY WAY

No online poker all week as I look forward to St Kitts trip. Decided to give the Stanley Casino £20 Sunday night a whirl to mainly get tired out for the long haul. Decent field again and at the break and top up was happy with stack and the just short of £2000 pot giving £600 to winner. Only one major pot I was involved in when well stacked raised with JJ in early position to find 4 others get involved including 2 small stack all ins. JJ was best pre flop hand but a kq8 flop didnt look promising.Still betting but both checked and a 10 turn. Ck Ck brought 9 to give me straight. I pushed all in and the hesitation told me I would be lucky to get paid off so I was surpried with the extra 15k call and he showed 99 from river trips. Other 2 involved in hand showed ak and kq. Monsta pot was enuff to let me cruise abit into final table. Bit sorry for Barry " the rail " when well stacked on 50k plus pushed all in to a 20k raise for the guy to call and show JJ. Didnt help that I was dealing to turn the 3rd Jack on the river and Barry was gone. Game is so cruel at times.
Disappointed myself at final table in mad rush of 3 hands. Single raise faced large all in to have to fold. Raised in late position with KJ hearts to run into slow play KK then on BB my J6 clubs got 10 6 2 with 2 clubs. My bet of 12k faced big all in raise but I thought he was bluffing so called. he showed 10 2 which held up.
Home for 1.30 anyway with £80 for trip fund and a chance to maybe snatch a couple of hours kip. Getting picked up at 4.45 for flight to Gatwick. Please please please no trouble with flight as we are fkd if there is. Meet up with rest of squad hopefully at 8 for our 11.20 departure to St Kitts. Over and out now and Ill keep in touch during trip.

EXPLANATION OF THE RAKE

EXPLANATION OF THE RAKE

DIARY OF A POKER PLAYER

DIARY OF A POKER PLAYER

WOMENS DIARY

SATURDAY 28TH OCTOBER 2007

I saw him in the evening and he was acting really strange. I had been shopping in the afternoon with the girls and I did turn up a bit late so thought it might just be that. The bar was really crowded and loud so I suggested we go somewhere quieter to talk. He was still very very subdued and distracted so I suggested we go somewhere nice to eat.
All through dinner he just didnt seem himself, he hardly laughed and didnt pay any attention to me or what I was saying, I just knew something was wrong.
He dropped me off back home and I wondered if he was going to come in, I could tell he didnt want to but after hesitating he did.
I asked again if there was something wrong but he just half shook his head and turned the televission on.
After about 10 mins of total silence I said I was going upstairs to bed. I put my arms around him and told him I loved him dearly. He didnt reacted too much but gave a sigh and a sad sort of smile. He didnt follow me up but did after about an hour and I was totally surprised when we made passionate love. He still seemed distant and a bit cold and I started to think that he was going to leave me and that he had found someone else. I cried myself to sleep.

MANS DIARY

SATURDAY 28TH OCTOBER 2007

MADE FINAL TABLE OF £25 FREEZE OUT AT CASINO BUT LOST WITH AA TO KK AND WAS GUTTED. I STILL GOT A SHAG THOUGH !

MARRIOT BURGER CONTRIBUTION FUND GROWS

MARRIOT BURGER CONTRIBUTION FUND GROWS

No success in my 1st live event pre St Kitts trip at Grosvenor and decide to venture to Stanleys for the Tuesday £10 £10 £10 event ( entry, one top up one max re buy )
Decent field of around 60 so winner be about £500.
1st hand guy hardly shuffles new pack in order and guy to my left says " Im folding without looking- did ya see that shuffle" Sure enuff A5 hearts and a flop of 2 hearts on board and inside draw for me. Decent bet which I call. Turn brings obv hit straight and all in. Called by other and I fold ( forgot its rebuy ) They both show straight to which turn heart comes in on river> ( wudda cudda shudda )
Next hand AJ sb I call 300 bet raise. Flop gives me top pair which I bet for raiser to announce all in. Fk it call now I have re buy announcing I think you got QQ gl. Yip he shows QQ but poker gods smile for rvr jack to appear. Next hand see me flop flush and take down another nice pot. Why isnt it always like this?
Get to break with 1/2 decent stack and shortly after start take down monsta pot calling single raise with 67 diamonds to flop straight with straight flush draw. 2 others betting into me and all in takes it down. Crusing now and my KK decent raise is called to anutha Jack high flop and all in announced by guy with flush draw. KK holds up.
Final table sees 3 players fall quick and eventually last 4. Call with Q9 for big stacked BB to announce all in. Gamble gamble time I call and he shows a7 off. Dealer obliges nicely with qq3 flop followed by quad queen on turn.
My 99 takes out next player and then heads up 2/1 stacked against with good m8 of mine Craig Foggo the provy man. We had decided to split money but still play for the " Pride" lol.
2nd hand AA . I limp for him to announce all in. He shows ak and board comes 4 diamonds to his King but I also have the diamond Ace. Next hand he calls to my 96. Flop comes 39k and he announces all in. No way him King I call and he shows 36. 9 stays good and its £350 quid each but a big convidence booster for St Kitts.
Dollars please Mr Cashier.
One at least or max 2 more live games before leaving on Monday for St K.
Ill keep u informed.

WELCOME BACK AZIMUT

WELCOME BACK AZIMUT

Just finished that last post and thought I would check out our other links. Was delighted to see my mate Azimut has re opened his blogg after a short break through one reason and another. Anyone that reads ours should not miss Azimuts. Always good stuff on there to help and amuse you.

ITS NO TO THE MARRIOT BURGERS!

ITS NO TO THE MARRIOT BURGERS!

Its a no no to my 1500 target I set myself for the up and coming St Kitts visit. A big double tilt weekend left me deciding thats it was no more online poker for 2 weeks and my return from St Kitts. Final amount achieved was $1128 over my period on Pacific which at the end of the day I should be happy with yet somehow I must admit being disappointed with. Trying to analize the situation left me with the conclusion my head wasnt on the job proppa and I was letting too many bad beats effect my game more than I thought. My final game online was the MPPP CPC Final on cryptologic which I was disappointed with after decent start. Top pair Q with AQ was caught by weak bet by me allowing straight to hit home and then up and down with flush draw flop to my Q 10 s didnt come home from my BB. So its now 4 live games before leaving and thats it.
Its always interesting when you talk to other online players about their feelings with regards to software and other common topics that come up. Hers a one for you to ponder. Have you ever been in a game when you fear you are playing more than one player in the same game. This is especially for you multi tournie players.
BEWARE WHEN YOU GET DOWN TO THE LAST 12/13 OF A TOURNIE BECAUSE THIS MITE HAPPEN TO YOU. COUNT THEM AND SEE. IS IT BECAUSE THERES AN EXTRA PLAYER AGAINST YOU?

COUNT THE PLAYERS IN THE PICTURE BELOW. CLICK ON IT AND TRY AND WORK OUT WHERE THAT EXTRA PLAYER COMES IN FROM?

NEW TASTEY MCDONALDS

NEW TASTEY MCDONALDS

Forgot to mention the other day when I came out the Grosvenor from the Friday night tournament I was starving so called into the local drive thru Mcdonalds. They had a new tasty treat on offer. Heres the pic - don't miss it next time ya driving!

CLICK TO DOWNLOAD

Mtt Success for Teamdobbs!

Mtt Success for Teamdobbs!

Just thought I would let you all know,Matto who is useless at posting had abit of success last week. Im relieved for him because there has been a general feeling of concern for his state of mind at the poker table! When I first met matto he used to win all the time but never really thought he was that great. After becoming friends from constantly playing "8maha two flops!" t the grosvenor cash games until 6 in the morning a couple of hundred quid lighter I realised he was a good player, tight but knew how to read the cards out there. Anyway Matto changed his game soon after getting ripped for being a tight bastard and for the last few months he has been donating more chips than lenny henry and bob geldof! Things have turned around for him now he played a multi on bluesquare last week...$100 double chance and won it picking up $3000! Nice one mate keep it up! I heard the new thursday and asked him what his bankroll strategy was now he has that, to which he replied "Im gonna play 2 / 4$ blinds or 5 / 10$!"

COUNTDOWN TO ST KITTS

COUNTDOWN TO ST KITTS

Its 16 days and counting to the Caribbean Classic in St Kitts. Dont want to sound a moaner but Ive been amazed and flabbergasted as to the very poor handling of our flight booking by the Crypto agent who is based in Canada. Im not the only one so that makes me feel better- i just hope I get there OK and will not be totally convinced until Im sitting in my seat on the plane and on my way.
Flying out one week earlier than start of tournie for a week of relaxation with my wife and a few of the regular online crew. Dont know what it is but I have this strange feeling Im gonna do well.
Hit bad patch on Pacific so decided to move to Poker Stars to give that a try. Bad start but Ive recovered and am now cashing regular in small stts although I do find it totally different to pacific but more enjoyable tougher game even though it is very low staked games Im playing.
After weeks of barren Friday nights at the Grosvenor I eventually got back to the final table despite being only 2400 at the break. Chip and a chair stuff.
Final table was total joke with a trainee dealer not having a clue what she was doing. When only 4 hands are dealt in a 20 minute level then you know something just aint right. After a few moans I became the bad boy and so bored out my skull decided to push with 1st sight of hand I got. A9 was enuff utg which hit AQ and bye bye in 8th place which to be honest I was glad to get off the table.
S2C2 had the joy of finishing in bubble position 10th but hes now getting reasonable consistent finishes there.
Good luck to Drunkenmaster7 on full tilt but I know hes already hitting good results so be lucky and keep trucking.